Reviewed by Emma Crowley
Tori Williamson is alone. After a tragic event left her isolated from her loved ones, she’s been struggling to find her way back to, well – herself. That’s why she set up her blog, The Beginner’s Guide to Loneliness, as a way of – anonymously – connecting with the outside world and reaching others who just need a little help sometimes.
When she’s offered a free spot on a wellbeing retreat in exchange for a review on her blog, Tori is anxious about opening herself up to new surroundings. But after her three closest friends – who she talks to online but has never actually met – convince her it’ll do her some good, she reluctantly agrees and heads off for three weeks in the wild (well, a farm in Wales).
From the moment she arrives, Tori is sceptical and quickly finds herself drawn to fellow sceptic Than, the retreat’s dark and mysterious latecomer. But as the beauty of The Farm slowly comes to light she realizes that opening herself up might not be the worst thing. And sharing a yurt with fellow retreater Bay definitely isn’t. Will the retreat be able to fix Tori? Or will she finally learn that being lonely doesn’t mean she’s broken . . .
Many thanks to Simon and Schuster UK via NetGalley for my copy of The Beginner’s Guide to Loneliness to review and to Sharon for having my review on the blog.
The Beginner’s Guide to Loneliness is the debut novel from Laura Bambrey and to be honest it’s hard to believe that this is the author’s first book as it reads like someone who has been writing for years and has published many books. It has the perfect blend of humour and laugh out loud moments mixed with the exploration of more serious issues that our main protagonist Tori is grappling with. There is so much for the reader to take from this story and you find yourself nodding along with the advice given at the beginning of each chapter in the form of an excerpt from Tori’s blog The Beginners Guide to Loneliness. Don’t skip past these nuggets of advice as you may be tempted to do because if we all took these words on board our lives would be all the more fruitful for it. The book moves along at a steady pace and is filled with a diverse range of characters each dealing with their own problems, fears and worries. The majority of the story is set at The Farm, a retreat in Wales, which did surprise me but there was enough going on here without the need to move the setting around apart from at the beginning and towards the end.
Tori was a brilliantly written character from beginning to end and you are rooting for her from page one. There are definitely characteristics of Tori that I could identify with and see within myself and I thoroughly enjoyed accompanying her on her journey to find her way out of the guilt and loneliness that eats away at her and has impacted her life so drastically and deeply. The reasons for which slowly become clear over the course of her stay at the retreat. Tori runs a blog called The Beginners Guide to Loneliness and although she prefers to remain anonymous she has built up a huge following thanks to her incredible writing which resonates with so many readers. The blog offers a place for people to talk and garner support as being lonely is such a big taboo. She has a trio of friends, Nat, Hugh and Sue, who she talks to privately in a chat room and here is where she can spill out everything that is bothering her. The trio has never met in person but it feels like they have known each other forever and they have become known as the Warriors.
To outsiders Tori appears confident and full of life but in reality she lives in a drab flat and money seems to be a problem. Two major events in her life, the loss of her mother and her fiancée dumping her, all within the space of a month, have severely affected her and she sees no way of moving on from both the guilt and loneliness. She has isolated herself from people and is afraid of anyone coming to close but really she doesn’t deserve to feel this way. So when a chance to review a wellness retreat for the blog comes up, The Warriors encourage her to go for it. Little does she realise that said retreat deep in the Welsh countryside may not be as glamourous as she expected. But maybe that’s all for the better as going back to basics will help her push her reservations to the side and face her issues head on.
Tori’s arrival at the farm provided plenty of laugh out loud moments and a plethora of characters are introduced. It’s run by Ted and Lizzie who live there with their daughter Rowan and they offer lots of alternative therapies, sessions and activities to get people out of their shell and to meet their problems head on. There really is no escape and all forms of communication are taken away from the guests. How will Tori cope without access to her phone and the chats with the Warriors? She is even more surprised to find that she has to share a tent with the handsome Bay and his dog Dennis.
Initially Tori was very reluctant to engage with what was going on and found things to be on the hippish end of things but really she had no other choice but to get stuck in and confront what has dominated her life for quite some time. I loved to see her gradually unwinding and becoming more forthcoming although a particular nasty incident does force her to get things out in the open. She really had to face her fears and listen to herself to makes the process a worthwhile and productive one. She needed to leave her lacklustre life and the bad memories behind but when you have become so ingrained in this way of thinking it can be really hard to do so.
I loved how a real sense of community developed amongst the troubled souls who found themselves at the retreat. The friendship Tori strikes up with Doreen especially was lovely to see and it allowed Tori to not make rash judgements on people and to dig a little deeper and to find out what made people tick. It was like everyone was helping each other overcome their problems. Everyone was looking for the root cause and working on healing it. The interactions between Tori and Bay were brilliant to read about. There was plenty of sparring between the pair, miscommunications and misreading of signals but you could tell a spark was there. I desperately wanted them to dig that little bit deeper. But on the other hand the character of Than, he was always by Tori’s side and you wondered could there be something romantically there for her too or was she too caught up in trying to overcome the guilt and deal with her panic attacks to venture down a romantic path?
Than started off as a decent enough character but more serious undertones surrounding his personality began to come through. I couldn’t fathom why Tori accepted the way that he spoke to her and the fact he was so dominating and controlling. He was publicly cruel, snide and at times downright mean and I wanted the others to stand up to him but they seemed reluctant to do so. Bay and Than were the complete anthesis of each other, both very well written characters who cause plenty of soul searching for Tori on her journey. I loved how we saw the evolution of Tori from beginning to end. I wanted her to stand up for herself and grow bolder and braver. To take on challenges without questioning every little thing and to put the loneliness behind her. The retreat was providing her with all the tools to do so alongside the support of Ted, Lizzie and the instructors not to mention her fellow guests. But Tori needed to build up her strength and the courage of her convictions to deal deal with things head on. Has she ability to do so or will a surprising turn of events shatter any confidence, stability and new found boldness that she has acquired?
The Beginner’s Guide to Loneliness was an impressive debut with plenty of food for thought for the reader. I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it. I did guess a little bit as to the big reveal but not specific details and on reflection the clues were there for the reader to see if I had just dug a little deeper. The only thing I will say is that I felt Than’s aspect of the story seemed to disappear into thin air and I feel it definitely needed more exploration. I wanted to know what motivated him and it felt like a chunk of the book was missing. Apart from that I would highly recommend this book. It’s thought provoking, funny, emotional and highlights the inner working of friendship and how to deal with trouble when it comes into our life path. I’m already looking forward to reading much more from Laura Bambery in the future.
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